The Weird Mood

Today, I'm in a funk. I'm in a funk that is unshakable, and it completely sucks. Its definitely been a rough 24 hours.

All day long, I'm home with a 3 (almost 4) year old and an 8 month old. Clearly, I'm not alone. Madison talks more than just about anyone I've ever met. Seriously, she even talks in her sleep. Mason is at the age where he is always all up in my face. Constantly. Trinity gets home from school, and she's constantly talking (today, she informed me that hot dogs were dog's legs, but whatever).

But man, I am lonely.

I have no friends up here, which is ok- It isn't as if the friends I have back in Kansas were jumping to hang out with me. Once you become a mom, it seems that your friends kind of distance themselves from you. Maybe its because you talk about your kids too much? Maybe they don't get it? I'm not sure.

Scott's a good guy, but lately he's been in his own world. His current job is bugging the crud out of him, and he's prepping to start a new job with a railroad. Going from the airlines to the railroad is probably going to be an interesting career change with lots of challenges, but I have complete faith that he can handle it. It'll be good for him, and us, in the long run. He's super excited about it, which is great.

I don't know, like I said, I'm in a funk. Taking care of the house, taking care of the kids, working out budgets, going to school- its enough to keep me busy. I wouldn't trade being able to stay home with the kids for anything.

I know, I should probably look into a mom playgroup or something. The thing is, I'm not an interesting person. Seriously. I'm not funny, I'm not the life of the party, I'm not witty. I'm really boring. And frankly, sometimes other people's kids bother me. Not the ones that behave- but the ones that are allowed to run the show. You don't want to discipline your kids, great- but I don't want to deal with a disrespectful child who doesn't understand why it isn't appropriate to smack someone or call them a poopy head.

So then we circle back around. Maybe I could get a hobby, but how much time do I actually have to devote to something? I have no energy as it is, let alone a sitter.

I think I'm destined for lonely-ville.

Anyways, enough of that pity party. This girl is going to bed. Maybe. I'll at least attempt it.