I remember being in high school and recognizing all the drama around us. So much backstabbing, so much hypocrisy, so much blaming others for things rather than taking responsibility for your own actions. Naturally, I assumed once we graduated we'd all be adults. We'd enter the world with a good, strong head on our shoulders. We wouldn't have drama- we'd be too busy being adults! Being productive members of society!
Yeah, I was wrong.
Typically, I am a VERY good judge of character. I can spot a liar and a snake from a mile away. I know what people to stay away from, because they give me a bad vibe. I've very seldom been proven wrong about a person. Of course, this was all based on face-to-face meetings. I never realized how different the Internet could be. I figured the majority of people, like myself, would represent themselves over the Internet just like they would "in real life". I mean, why act like a super nice person online when in reality you're an artificial twit? It will catch up to you- so why lie? Why try to make complete strangers, (who you'll probably never meet), like you based on a falsified version of yourself? Makes sense, right? Evidently, not to some.
I can't really speak for other people, nor do I try. I know who I am. I am honest, I am devoted, and I am strong willed. I wont be pushed into a corner, nor will I sit down and shut up when I see things that aren't right. I stand up for what I believe is right. Granted, sometimes I'm wrong- and that's ok. I re-evaluate my opinion, apologize for offending people, and move on. But I don't go with the flow, just because its the cool thing to do. I don't follow blindly. I'm not naive.
Recently, I've been accused of doing some pretty awful things by a girl who was once a very close friend. Why would she pin stuff on me? Because I disagreed with her (about something I ended up being right about). Maybe I was a threat to her, or maybe I was just disposable at that moment. I guess since I quit kissing her rear and trying to make her feel better for a stupid thing she did, it was time to teach me a lesson. Silly girl. Really, it didn't phase me much. The girl has no idea that there aren't a whole lot of people that actually like her, especially now after she's shown her true colors. She doesn't realize that the person who actually did everything is on her side. She doesn't realize that every attempt at trying to get someone on "her" side makes her look incredibly desperate and dumb. Or maybe she does, and just doesn't care. Maybe its some big egotistical plot? I'm not sure.
You may ask why I'm even bringing this up. Well, 1) its my blog, and its been on my mind, and 2) I just happened to notice that this very person has been checking in on my blog. Which is fine, its public for a reason. I can't imagine being that important to someone, where they would dispose of me and then continue to make false accusations about me to keep me away from "her" territory. I can't imagine wanting to check up on someone who, in her unquoted words, is equal to a terrorist leader and a backstabber. Doesn't make much sense- but really, the vain rarely do.
I do know that anyone with half a brain cell would check with both sides and instead of following blindly. I never understood the quote “You may know a man by the company he keeps”, until now. To me, it always seemed wrong. I had hung out with plenty of people who didn't do good things, but I always kept who I was and kept my integrity. Yet, now I understand it. I've had so many people come to me and say "wow, I thought you were just like her since you guys seemed so close, but I'm glad I realized you aren't". True integrity, true decency shines through a person. It doesn't need to be proven through private messages. It doesn't need to be fabricated at some lame attempt to maintain "friends". It doesn't need to be shown through falsified documentation, nor does it need to be shown through personal attacks. It will be there, and it will come through. Fortunately for me, I know what shines through me. I know what kind of person I am, regardless of one's ill attempt at making me out to be the bad guy.
And if I'm being completely honest, I pray nightly for this person. Not because God says to pray for your enemies, but because I truly believe this individual has a problem that needs addressed. With any luck, one day they'll see it for themselves and turn their life around. Until then, I'm sure I'll continue to be the punching bag- which is fine. I know who I am. My friends know who I am. GOD knows who I am. That's all that matters.
To Thine Own Self Be True.
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